Sip N Bite voted 'most customer friendly' IIT joint, distraught owner attempts suicide

A recently conducted online poll which found Cafe Sip N Bite, a multi-cuisine restaurant in IIT Delhi, at the top position among various eateries at IIT Delhi, with regards to 'customer friendliness and satisfaction', has shocked and deeply anguished the management and staff of the restaurant, to the extent that unconfirmed reports say that the owner had attempted suicide hours within hearing the news.
"After all the efforts we go through, especially after all the hours and days Sahib (the owner) spends at the counter frowning, harassing and arguing with customers, such a verdict is not just unjustified...but completely uncalled for" argues Rhondulal, the Kitchen Head at the restaurant. "It's as if all our work doesn't count, as if it's just...(struggling for words) completely ignored" adds Rhondulal, visibly shaken if not disturbed by the news.
The poll was held 2 days ago on ANFSnsCD's top secret online polling platform. Despite the relatively short voting time period of 10 minutes, a large number of votes were observed, a clear majority of which favored Sip N Bite over other notable entries like Holistic Food Center and FX.
It is believed that within hours of hearing of this development, the owner of Sip N Bite tried to commit suicide by consuming large, unhealthy amounts of the restaurant's Sambar.
While the restaurant management categorically rejected this incident in a statement made later in the day, inside sources tell ANFSnsCD that at this very moment the owner is recovering from the overdose, most likely at the nearby AIIMS trauma center. "The effect is more psychological than physical" asserts an inside source, who doesn't wish to be named. "And I'm not just talking about the Sambar, imagine everything you worked for in your life, everything you believed in...gone in an instant".
In the meanwhile, fallen morale is among the least of the restaurant's immediate concerns. Apparently, Sip N Bite is having a tough time finding a temporary substitute to service the counter in the owner's absence. "Not just everyone can be pissed off every single moment of the day- 24x7x365. Listen, just because of this poll, we are not going to change the way we work around here. We will look only for a suitable replacement, if we can't find one we will wait !" thunders Rhondulal. "This incident has only taught us to work harder" he adds, with roars of approval from the staff. There are rumors that, in light of recent developments, the self service policy is to be extended to include cleaning your own plates after eating, keeping them back and wiping the table clean, all under the supervision and guidance of the waiters. Furthermore all return change will be given out in denominations of Cadbury Fruit and Nut, Dairy Milk, 5 Star, Eclair and an assortment of chewing gums.
Says our inside source "Just wait and watch, I bet you my staff canteen card (where we really eat) this is not going to happen ever again".

CSC System Administrator 'squished', needs net to change own proxy limit

IIT Delhi. In an exclusive interview with ANFSnsCD yesterday, the CSC System Administrator candidly confessed to having been squished "for over 3 days now". The incident is believed to have occurred last Sunday afternoon, after having viewed a short video on the hugely popular social networking site Facebook.

"I was just browsing my friend's new friend's photos...she was not aware of the new privacy settings you see" explained the Sysadmin, "when I suddenly see the Rajnikanth escape video on the sidebar...you know the one with the horse sliding and all". Having heard a lot about the video's popularity but never actually viewed it, the Sysadmin excitedly opened the video in a new tab and waited for it to buffer. In the meanwhile, the Sysadmin proceeded to participate in the 'How Sadistic Are You' Facebook quiz. "I had been getting all those hate mails after the new proxy system...I was just a little curious" he admitted. However, to his utter horror, when the Sysadmin clicked on the quiz result link, he was confronted with the widely dreaded 'Check Proxy Quota' page.

"At first I could not understand what was happening. I had never seen that page before....now that I think about it, we should really work on making that page more explanatory. Maybe a bit sympathetic too" observed the Sysadmin.

Surely getting squished should not be a problem to a System Administrator. However, in what appears to be a cruel twist of fate, the Sysadmin seems to have stored the procedure to increase his own proxy limit in his Gmail account, saved as an attachment to a draft. "They are all Unix terminal commands, most of them with parameters. How can you expect me to remember them all?" ranted the Sysadmin.

With a lump in his throat, the Sysadmin informed that he even tried asking his colleagues to log in for him on his machine. "But then they would not be able to use the net at the same time. So they refused, but yes I can understand why". On the suggestion to ssh into, or use the IP of, a logged in machine the Sysadmin grumbled "That's just plain unethical" before noting this reporter's name and entry number.

At this point in the interview, the Sysadmin finally broke down in front of ANFSnsCD. "I still can't believe it, it was just a 3 minute video...not even HD !"

Despite several attempts on this reporter's part, the Sysadmin categorically denied releasing any details on his proxy limits.